Here And Now
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A difficult day today. Morose and depressed. Had a couple of personal shocks lately, including bereavement. Family stuff.
But I have discovered that expressing myself on my blog, the forum or even email communication is a great way to just get through. Focusing on someone else is really the best way to forget yourself. Maybe that is why being in love is such a great ecstatic experience. One minute you are the centre of the universe, the next a god or goddess enters your life and nothing is the same again.
I like what G.K. Chesterton (journalist and novelist) wrote,
“When a man knocks at the door of a brothel, he is looking for God.”
I have had to replace my hard drive and been off line for about two weeks. Its interesting to have a break from the same thing and come back and view it with fresh eyes.
The treatment experience is often best viewed looking back. I think its important to write spontaneously and grasp the full flavour of the moment, but for real understanding hindsight has 20/20 vision.
As soon as my week 24 results came in I was surprised to see that I automatically began counting down to the end of treatment instead of counting weeks into treatment. A subtle change and incredibly helpful. To know the biggest part of the journey has been accomplished and there is now only 16 weeks left makes it a bit easier mentally.
Also I have asked for and obtained a reduction in my ribavirin from 1200 to 1000 mg a day. I already feel a benefit in that the mental effects of tx are less. I will talk more on this when my body settles down to the new dose and I can see the true effects.
Although I have done 33 weeks of treatment I am reminded this week that I cannot get complacent. Buzz Trexler, (Ripshin) a journalist and pastor from USA who I have met through the hepc blogging community has just had to cease treatment at 36 weeks. This is due to some illnesses that have been caused by a compromised immune system.
Not only does he have to cope with terminating tx prematurely, but he still has the painful illness left to combat.
Buzz, you always sign off wishing others Grace and Peace. May you know that for yourself through this time.
The chances are very high that Buzz has done enough at 36 weeks to have cleared the virus and to remain clear for good.
Just when you thought you had all the pieces of the jigsaw in place suddenly some of them seem to jump off the board.
A difficult day today. Morose and depressed. Had a couple of personal shocks lately, including bereavement. Family stuff.
But I have discovered that expressing myself on my blog, the forum or even email communication is a great way to just get through. Focusing on someone else is really the best way to forget yourself. Maybe that is why being in love is such a great ecstatic experience. One minute you are the centre of the universe, the next a god or goddess enters your life and nothing is the same again.
I like what G.K. Chesterton (journalist and novelist) wrote,
“When a man knocks at the door of a brothel, he is looking for God.”
I have had to replace my hard drive and been off line for about two weeks. Its interesting to have a break from the same thing and come back and view it with fresh eyes.
The treatment experience is often best viewed looking back. I think its important to write spontaneously and grasp the full flavour of the moment, but for real understanding hindsight has 20/20 vision.
As soon as my week 24 results came in I was surprised to see that I automatically began counting down to the end of treatment instead of counting weeks into treatment. A subtle change and incredibly helpful. To know the biggest part of the journey has been accomplished and there is now only 16 weeks left makes it a bit easier mentally.
Also I have asked for and obtained a reduction in my ribavirin from 1200 to 1000 mg a day. I already feel a benefit in that the mental effects of tx are less. I will talk more on this when my body settles down to the new dose and I can see the true effects.
Although I have done 33 weeks of treatment I am reminded this week that I cannot get complacent. Buzz Trexler, (Ripshin) a journalist and pastor from USA who I have met through the hepc blogging community has just had to cease treatment at 36 weeks. This is due to some illnesses that have been caused by a compromised immune system.
Not only does he have to cope with terminating tx prematurely, but he still has the painful illness left to combat.
Buzz, you always sign off wishing others Grace and Peace. May you know that for yourself through this time.
The chances are very high that Buzz has done enough at 36 weeks to have cleared the virus and to remain clear for good.
Just when you thought you had all the pieces of the jigsaw in place suddenly some of them seem to jump off the board.
posted by Paul | 3:19 PM
3 Comments:
Paul:
I love your quote from Chesterton. I once plowed (and I mean plowed) my way through his book "Orthodoxy," but really mined some jewels when I captured what he was saying.
Paul, I'm afraid I did indeed get complacent about the treatment. Things were going so well that when the "mystery disease" snuck up on me, the medical people and I were all caught off guard ... and we are still trying get on balance.
I go to a wound treatment facility on Monday; have an appointment with my primary doctor that afternoon; and may have to eventually see an infectuous disease specialist.
Meanwhile, thanks for your encouraging words about the possibilities for success. As it stands, my doctor said that if the mystery disease clears up, I may be able to resume treatment.
Interesting that you had computer problems. In addition to my main hard drive, I have two "striped" hard drives that I largely use for creating worship videos and they are on the blink. I keep putting off taking it in.
Again, thanks for your uplifting words, and I pray that you walk in the grace and peace of God during your journey.
Buzz
Ephesians 3:12 In him and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence.
So I guess I'm gonna be bold and ask God that Pastor Buzz gets his cure with the weeks of treatment that he did. And also in my humble opinion I think 48 weeks may be overkill for people who have been negative throughout. I know I felt saturated at that point.
I'm thrilled to see you back online Paul and yeah, sigh the love thing...Happy for you that you have the love and support that we all need.
Strength and perseverence in Jesus Christ
Hi Paul,
I was sorry to hear you have had a bereavement in the family, may your faith uphold you in difficult times.
It is so good to see you blogging again.
Yes, counting down now instead of up, must have a huge psychological advantage.
God bless you
Miss Poppy
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